Unabashed adoration for Dogs (Mostly mine)

I love Dogs. This is not sarcasm. They're bloody terrific.
Dogs are fantastic, they're the zenith of unbridled happiness and admiration. Dogs are always happy to see you, regardless of the quality of your day, be it winning the lottery or maimed on a Trench in Lyons (What you're doing in WW1 era France I'll never know), a dog will always be absolutely delighted to see you. They're like sentient prozac.

My Dog can cheer me up by simply existing, she's the opposite of say....me. Har har har.

So Ruby, this rambling almost pointless post is dedicated to you, you fantastic Dog.

Teenagers and Children

A Poem

Children are like puppies.
Except I’ve never had the urge to punch puppies.

Teenagers are like people wrongly imprisoned
Cause they never shut the fuck up.

Children are like bags at an airport
You shouldn’t leave them unattended

Teenagers are like sex offenders
You’re bound to find them on facebook

Children are like lies
sometimes having too many leads to prison

Teenagers are like fries
They taste better...when heated

Children are like the Pope
They interfere with things that shouldn’t concern them....and they’ve never had sex

Teenagers are like Pol Pot
Because they have stress issues......and hate wearing glasses

A child is like self respect
Because sometimes you lose it on holiday

Teenagers are like doing novelty comedy poems.
Because they’re not all that talented but they hide it well.

Children are like volatile liquids
Don’t put them in the boot of your car

Children aren’t like me
Because women like them.

Teenagers are like miracles.
Except Teenagers are real.